life

I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual. –Thoreau

Like most typical American households, my alarm rang obnoxiously early this Thanksgiving morning, and I was up long before the sun. Most times, us early risers are cooks, waking to tend to a turkey or its accompaniments. Instead, I turned on bright lights and various hot irons, because by noon I had styled and loved on dozens of sweet, talented, beautiful (inside and out) young ladies. As a full-service pageant consultant, Thanksgiving nationals makes for one of the busiest weeks of our entire year. We move into a suite of rooms at the host hotel near Disneyland for ten days to support our girls and their families as they compete, and workdays often run into the eighteen-hour vicinity. It is madness in the best, sparkliest way, and my Thanksgivings have always been that way! In true #tbt spirit….

First as a longtime contestant and queen, now as a consultant, pageantry is my most longstanding Thanksgiving tradition. There are only a handful of years across my lifetime where I didn’t start the holiday season in or around lots of crowns.

Though it doesn’t behoove a traditional Thanksgiving dinner, we’re used to it. We get our turkey fix in a few weeks when I do the whole spread and then some, for our annual Chrismakkuh party. The pageant hosts a lovely formal black-and-white Thanksgiving, and we’ve attended in the past, like when I was competing or royalty, most recently about 7 years ago when our kid sister gave pageantry a (brief yet successful) swing.

We’ve occasionally had one of our mommies organize lovely pageant family Thanksgiving dinners. We invite all of our clients and their families, take over part of a nearby restaurant, and make quite the raucous bunch… one year there were fifty-odd of us having a dance party in the private room at Ruth Chris between courses!

And over the years, we’ve developed our Coe thanksgiving tradition… All-you-can-eat Korean bbq. Sometimes it’s just us two, other times we bring a few, or many, clients with us. We are beyond casual about it- I’m generally barefaced and in leggings, so we head into Garden Grove, where you never need a reservation at Cham Sut Gol. 

We eat banchan and grill pounds of delicious meats and seafood, until we are full and slightly smoky. We always discuss what we’re thankful for, and the evening is full of toasts and jokes- very festive, but low key comparatively, and a nice escape from the formality of pageant land. And then we head to the self-serve freezer, to dip ice cream cones for dessert! The flavor selection varies, but it’s always several yummy options… It’s amazing how I manage to make room for a double cone after gorging myself on bulgogi.

I make a conscious effort to live my life with gratitude, but in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I wanted to share some things (beyond K-bbq) that  I’m especially thankful for this week, from the pageant trenches.

L’Oreal Elnett. I’m on can number 3 for the pageant thus far, and I’m appreciative of its pageant-proof hold, brushability, and mostly inoffensive scent, since I’m sometimes in a cloud of it for hours. I’ve been using it since it needed to be imported, and I love that you can get it anywhere nowadays.

Fashion tape, e6000, and good old fashioned needle-and-thread. Between these three go-to’s, Mrs Ravayna can make most anything work! On that note,  I’m especially grateful for zippers cooperating on evening gowns today, which is not always the case, and that I haven’t had wardrobe issues drastic enough to use the sewing machine I always bring.

David, who’s generally a beast, but really steps his game up this week. We run in lockstep, except for when he shoulders a burden completely (like building the master schedule, or steaming dozens of gowns) to ease my workload. He helps our girls express the most amazing charisma and heart, and when I see the relationships he has with our sweethearts, my heart is warm and fuzzy to know what a fabulous dad he will be someday.

Our girls and their families. As they are in and out of our suite all week, I’m sometimes awed by how lucky we are to be entrusted to help these girls grow and dream, then be able to watch them succeed. Our girls are classy on and off the stage and though the goals we pursue are of personal grace, not perfection, they never cease to blow me away. Many of our clients are not in attendance this week, and we are missing them terribly!  I’m so thankful to have clients, who became friends and grew into our family.

And for pageants on the whole.  Despite the media brouhaha, a lifetime of pageantry has been so, so good to me.  It honed my communication and stage skills, instilled a work ethic and servant’s heart, and taught me to both win and lose with grace and class. Winnings paid for a large portion of my college education, and we’re now employed in the industry. Pageants created and strengthened some of my longest, most trusted and most treasured friendships- the girls in those ancient pictures are my ride-or-dies still,  so many years later.  I learned to be confident in my authentic self, to be brave even when I didn’t feel that way, and to tease hair to the heavens.  Crowns may dull, but being a firecracker lasts a lifetime, and I’m so appreciative of all this and so much more.

Wishing you warm hearts and full bellies this thanksgiving!

loveRavayna